Play Hard, Work Smart. What do you actually want?

Reconnect with your dreams.

Do you know what you want? What do you stand for? How can you build the foundations which will help you to achieve success on your terms?

Stop procrastinating and start chasing your dreams

“If I were you, I wouldn’t start from here.” I love this quote, relayed by an Irish friend of mine, despite its absurdity! What does it mean?

Whatever your goals and aspirations, you cannot change where you start your journey from, so start from here. There is no benefit being frustrated or anxious about your starting point.

Accept it and look ahead. Focus on what you can control and your next steps. After all, you can only control what you do today. There is no need to look back.

First things first - do you know what you want?

Sounds obvious doesn’t it. Whether you are a school leaver, graduate, or looking for a change of direction, it is important to think about what you want. Where do you start? Take some time to reconnect with your dreams, and to think about what brings you joy and excitement.

If you could wave a magic wand, what would you be doing? Think of people who have inspired you, who you follow on social media, or you would travel to listen to or see perform. Now think about what it would be like to do any of their jobs – not just the social media shine, but what happens behind the scenes. Is it just the trappings of success that appeal to you, the houses, the cars, the jewellery and the parties? Is it the experience, the working hours, the money or the fame?

This is how you make your dreams come true

Now think of your dream job as the top of a mountain, Dream Mountain. Think about all the steps involved in preparing for an expedition. You will need to learn new skills, work on your physical fitness and gather resources while planning your route, all before you set foot on the mountain. As you start to break this down, you start to get a clearer picture on what you need to do next. Each job you take becomes an opportunity to learn, as well as providing an income - in this way you are no longer simply working for money, you are investing in yourself and your dreams - how much more exciting is that!

Once you have a direction of travel, you cannot go into this half-heartedly - this is your dream we are talking about! Once that spark is ignited, you commit to taking that first step and learn to enjoy the process of shaping your life for your future self. Take some time to research what is actually involved, what skills you would need and what resources, and relate this to what you know you enjoy doing. How could you acquire the skills and experiences you need to be successful, based on your own definition of of success?

Be kind and patient with yourself

Do you feel excited about the prospect of chasing your dreams, or do you fear you will never get there, that you will fail, that life is too hard as it is? Everyone climbs a mountain at their own pace. Even as you feel competing pressures to ‘be realistic’, to ‘settle for what you have got’, to follow other people’s thoughts on what is ‘good for you’, stay true to yourself. This is your life, and it is your choice how you move forward from here.

Do you remember the joy you experienced as a child when you discovered something new or played a game you loved? That is the same kind of passion that should drive you up the mountainside. It is much more fun to see the world, for all its challenges and opportunities, as a stage on which to live a fulfilling and rewarding life.

What do you stand for?

Your core beliefs provide the benchmark against which you assess every aspect of your interaction with the world. However, certain aspects of our belief system are already in place by the time we reach the age of four.

Your outlook in terms of whether you see the world as safe and loving or as a scary, dangerous environment are based on the conditioning you received from those around you – your parents, siblings, grandparents and so on. Isn’t that astonishing?

You owe it to yourself to take time to re-evaluate your beliefs and whether they suit the person you are today. This will enable you to remove the shackles applied by those around you by adopting beliefs that more accurately reflect your own views.

How do you view the world?

Try this exercise to start the process - put a list questions together where there may be potential for discrimination. Consider areas such as religion, ethnicity, sexuality, gender or age. Now score your level of prejudice on a scale of one to four, with one being low and four being high. Can you identify certain prejudices, situations where you may discriminate, either consciously or subconsciously?

What goes through your mind if you see a teenager in a hoody, a pensioner crossing the road holding up traffic, a businessman in a suit or a member of an extreme political group? How do your beliefs change with the degree to which you know someone or something – your family, friends, community, country and so on. How do some of your responses sit with how you see yourself today?

Have any of your responses surprised you? The good news is, now you are starting to think about your core beliefs, your core values, you can change them by consciously thinking about them and applying them in day to day situations. Your core beliefs provide the benchmark against which you measure every situation you find yourself in - your perception of events and how you respond are all tied to your core beliefs and values, and how you therefore project yourself.

How does this help you?

Connect with your dreams, what brings you joy and excitement, and your direction of travel will help map out the skills and experiences you need to acquire as you develop yourself in preparation for conquering your Dream Mountain, getting your dream job. Understanding what you stand for, your core beliefs, and how this affects how you view the world, and therefore how the world sees you, forms the foundations from which you can chart a way forward.

Are you up for the challenge? Lets get started.

Colin Aurelius is an author, entrepreneur and strategic adviser who has worked with a broad range of start-ups, early stage businesses and international giants over a 20 year period.

Colin works with school leavers, graduates and aspiring entrepreneurs to develop business leaders looking to build profitable businesses which have a positive impact on the world. Colin has worked with Henley Business School on entrepreneurial development programmes, and more recently with the Oxford Said Business School in areas including Fintech, Blockchain and Disruptive Marketing.